Finding An Amicable Way To End Your Marriage
9 Tips to End Your Marriage Amicably! #endyourmarriage #ruralmoney #rural #money #ruralareas
If you’re not looking at the prospect of an amicable way to end your marriage, then it’s likely already going to be a difficult time for you.
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Table of Contents
- 9 Tips to End Your Marriage Amicably! #endyourmarriage #ruralmoney #rural #money #ruralareas
- 9 Helpful Ways of Finding an Amicable Way to End Your Marriage
- 1. Remember That Your Children Come First
- 2. Don’t Let Communication Break Down
- 3. Avoid Rushing Your Partner
- 4. Work with The Right Professionals
- 5. Create a Timeframe Together
- 6. Seeing to Your Financial Needs
- 7. Don’t Make Assumptions About Their Intentions
- 8. Make Any Agreements About Equity
- 9. Be Ready to Set Boundaries
- Wrapping Up
You don’t need a long, drawn-out legal battle with waves that ripple out to affect your personal life from it, at the same time. I
f both you and your soon-to-be ex-spouse are on the same page in terms of wanting to keep the divorce amicable and avoid things getting ugly, then that’s a good place to start.
Here are a few tips to help you stick to that goal.
9 Helpful Ways of Finding an Amicable Way to End Your Marriage
1. Remember That Your Children Come First
The single best way to make sure that your divorce is on the right track is to make sure that you’re always operating with the best priorities, and those priorities are ensuring the mental and emotional health of your children throughout the divorce.
You want to be able to talk to them together to help them get through this major change in their lives, and you want to avoid the many bad habits such as using them as a go-between with your spouse, or complaining about your spouse to them.
Discussing child custody can be complex, but the stability and consistency of their routine is vitally important, so try to keep that as your central focus.
2. Don’t Let Communication Break Down
There can be raised tensions and hurt feelings in the process leading up to a divorce, but it’s important to make sure that you’re able to keep communications open, honest, and without getting too combative with your spouse while leading up to it.
You want to ensure that your tone encourages them to work with you, rather than simply trying to get any response from them of any kind.
You can use common ground, such as the involvement of any children or a legitimate interest in their wellbeing to show that you don’t have to act as enemies throughout the process.
3. Avoid Rushing Your Partner
You might be keen to get the process over and done with and to begin living this next chapter of your life without unfinished business hanging over your head, but the truth is that any steps to try and rush your partner are only likely to backfire on you in the end.
You might be ready for the divorce to be over, but your partner could be in a different emotional headspace from you.
Many people experience what is called the change curve at a different rate, and you shouldn’t be surprised if someone wants to resist what seems like such a major life change.
You can be there to help them through it and to talk with them about it, but you shouldn’t end every conversation with a call to action.
4. Work with The Right Professionals
You hear of it all the time.
Two parties might be going into a divorce with every idea of doing it amicably and peacefully, but once they get the lawyers involved, things suddenly start to become a lot more complicated and combative.
It’s not necessarily those lawyers’ fault, they’re working in the best interests of their clients as far as they see them.
As such, you have to make sure that you work with professionals who understand your interests, such as divorce expert Meghan Freed.
Making sure that any divorce advisors or legal help you have on your side is aligned with your desire for a more amicable end is one of the most important things in assuring it, as the advice they offer is more likely to be in keeping with it.
5. Create a Timeframe Together
When your partner is ready to discuss moving forward, then it’s time to start actually planning it out, and to put it down to a timeframe so that you make sure that neither of you is jerking the other around.
The process can take much longer than people expect, and part of this is only natural.
However, the longer a divorce goes on, the tougher it tends to be on both people.
As such, when you’re both committed to seeing it through, that’s when you should make an outlined plan, understand the different practical and legal steps that you have to take, and have a timeline of when you’re going to have them completed.
6. Seeing to Your Financial Needs
One of the reasons that divorces sometimes become embittered battles is because one person is going to be left in financial peril as a result of them, and as such, they have to take steps to see to their financial health out of necessity.
Divorce can be expensive for anyone, but it’s extra expensive for one who is reliant on the income of a spouse provider.
There are tips that you can take to make sure that you stay financially healthy after a divorce, by eliminating expenses, creating a plan to get rid of debt, and establishing a budget that can help you get used to your new normal.
However, the divorce agreement itself may play a key role in establishing a healthy financial setup for both parties.
7. Don’t Make Assumptions About Their Intentions
Delays can happen, questions can be raised, and there might be the occasional hiccup in your plans.
While you want to be able to straighten out any issues and get the process underway again as soon as possible, you should make sure that you don’t go reading too much into the intentions of your partners, especially if you’re going to make negative assumptions.
You might have suspicions that your partner is out to get you, or wants to deprive you more than they are letting on, but if you get defensive and suspicious from the start, then this mindset is going to influence your decisions throughout the entire divorce.
Let your representative worry about protecting you, give your partner the benefit of the doubt.
8. Make Any Agreements About Equity
If one person has been the breadwinner in a marriage or owns all of the assets, then you need to expect that those are going to be split.
That’s simply how it goes in most cases unless there’s an iron-clad prenup in play.
However, how those assets are split is going to depend on the circumstances of the marriage.
In most cases, a 50/50 split simply is not a thing.
This includes shared custody agreements.
If you want to avoid getting stuck on the need for this 50/50 split, then you need to start thinking about what is equitable, not what is equal.
What is fair, what do you need, and what are you willing to let go of to ensure you get it?
9. Be Ready to Set Boundaries
If things are going well during an amicable divorce, you might begin to think that you can remain friends with your spouse.
It’s not impossible that friendships can build up over time, but if you actively start trying to build one now, it can make things emotionally confusing.
Instead, you should focus on setting up your boundaries.
You don’t have to be rude or unfriendly with them, but you don’t have to try and create a social relationship with them while you’re in the middle of dismantling a marriage with them.
It’s simply not going to be wise in most cases.
Managing an amicable divorce isn’t always easy.
It requires planning and forethought on both sides.
However, with the tips above, hopefully, you can make it just a bit more manageable and get through the other side relatively unscathed.
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